You’re probably thinking that this article is about a lame girl with a lame love life. And you know what? You’re right! This is about a lame girl with a lame love life! Unfortunately though, that girl happens to be me (if ever that makes this a lot or at least a bit more interesting).
I’m not sure if it’s right for me to say that I have a lame love life. I’m not even sure if it’s acceptable to use the word “love life” in this article. Why? Mainly, because of two reasons: One, is I don’t have a love life right now, and; Two, is I never really had one before (now that’s something I’m pretty sure about). I know what you’re thinking. What’s the point of reading up to this part if my little black book of ex-boyfriends is empty, right? Don’t worry. I have a reasonable point to keep you going. Believe me.
It’s 100% true that I never had a boyfriend. Why didn’t I ever have a boyfriend, you might ask? (Maybe no one ever liked me, eh? ha-ha) I’d be lying if I told you that no one ever tempted to court me, so yes. I’ve had suitors (and I still don’t get what they see in me, really). As tempting as having suitors may sound, – for some, not for me – I always say no. Not just because my parents won’t allow me (and I have to obey), but because it is my own choice not to enter a relationship. Of course, I’m like most hopeless romantic girls who’d go crazy for a love story of their own. But, I’m even more hopeless romantic that I decided not to enter a relationship that would only satisfy me for the time being.
I have a variety of alibis for not having a boyfriend. People often find them believable, so they praise and take pride in the example I’m making. Right this moment, I want to be completely honest by admitting that I do have doubts in what I’m doing. From time to time, I ask myself series of questions. Like, am I doing this thing right? Have I ever influenced anyone to do the same thing? Should I continue or should I drop this goal and be like most girls? That’s such a tempting thing to do, dropping this goal. Because even though I never had a boyfriend, I still had crushes and I still tend to fall in love (or at least that’s what I like to think). It’s what makes this journey difficult, the insatiable human thirst for romance. This can be anyone’s stumbling block at some point in their lives.
Same as most people, I like the feeling of love (or infatuation, if I may say so). To have someone who makes my day with a simple look, smile or even a corny joke that I can’t help but laugh at. Someone who makes my heart beat fast with their presence. I’m not immune to it, you know? How I wish I was until the right time! That way, life would be a lot less perplexing.
I’m proud to say that I’ve had NO BOYFRIEND SINCE BIRTH! Why? This isn’t as easy as A-B-C, 1-2-3, or do-re-mi! It’s easier said than done, because God keeps on testing me. He brings amazing guys into my life. Who for some (or one), I happen to fall (or fell) in love with. Still, God is so gracious. He breaks my heart before any boy does. Meaning, before love completely blinds me, He makes a way for me not to fall any deeper. Like how a boy kept distance from me (but that’s another story). When God allows these things to happen, I get hurt. Sometimes I even get mad, blaming Him and questioning His ways. Which I know, is not right. Fortunately enough, I come to realize that He’s just being a good father to me, saving my heart from needless and unsolicited heartaches. I’m thankful for that.
I once heard that every time you enter a relationship, you give a piece of your heart. This is one of my motives for staying single. I want my first love to be my last. To preserve my heart for that one man God is preparing right now, JUST FOR ME. I long for the day he comes into my life, and receives my whole heart, not leftovers of it. I desire his hands to be the only hands that’ll ever get the hold of my heart, aside from God. The man God has for me? He will be the only man whose lips will ever touch mine. What can be more romantic than that?
I hope you’re getting the point I’ve been trying to make here. That needless to say, love is something sacred. That we shouldn’t just throw this word around, because the more we do, the less it’ll mean to us. You got that?
If you’ve entered and exited relationships before, don’t think that it’s too late for you to do the same thing I’m trying to. Of course, it isn’t. Not everyone gets to have the exact same love story. Maybe for your story, it wouldn’t matter much who your first love was, but who the last one will be. But that doesn’t mean I’m telling you that it’s okay to have more boyfriends. I still encourage you to stop giving away pieces of your heart right now. It may sound challenging (‘cause it is), but you have to believe you can. And the easiest way to begin this journey is by asking for God’s help and guidance.
On the other hand, if you’re like me, don’t feel so left-out (I know you feel left-out sometimes, because I do too). However, believe me, there is absolutely nothing to feel left-out about. You’ll have one as well, at the right time. Just trust God and keep up the good work!
As for me, my love life is not at all loveless. I have God, my family, relatives and friends whom I dearly love. Together with my love for them and myself, I made a wholehearted commitment to preserve my precious heart.
Do your best to keep this in mind and close to your heart, “Love is not a feeling, for feelings come and go. Love is not an attraction, for attraction fades. Love is a decision. A decision to love an imperfect being for the rest of your life.” as Mr. Danny de Guzman once said.
I hope to see more youth making wise decisions in their lives! God bless us all!
Footnote:
“To the man of my dreams – though as of now, you’re just a figment of my imagination – waiting for you keeps me going.” – Lisa Velthouse, from her book, “Saving My First Kiss” ♥
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